New Goals and Plans

I have been having a blast so far this spring/summer working out and running. It is certainly paying off physically too. I have been approached by numerous people at the gym who I do not know telling me how great I look and how I've been motivating them. What amazing things to hear!!

I've been super excited about the fact that I have signed up for my first half. While I'm outgoing, I'm not terribly amazing at asking for things (especially at work). I was telling Greg how I was thinking about asking the owner of the gym we go to if he'd sponsor me for the race if I wore one of his shirts with something about starting 2012 at 270 lbs and relatively inactive and look at me now running my first half. He said that he doesn't typically like to do stuff like that since he feels that he needs to do it across the board for everyone that asks, but he has noticed how great I've been doing, and that it is a great accomplishment and he will definitely be doing something for me. Greg thinks he might give us a month free membership (which is slightly more than the entry cost of the RnR half), so that would be a-ok in my book!

I've always been a long term planner and it's starting to come out now. I'm already forming goals for 2013, 2014, and 2015. Insane, I know, but it's who I am. There's also a chance it will change 5 times between now and then. So my current in-head timeline:


               Sept 2012: First Half-Marathon
               Aug 2013: First TriAthalon
               Jan 2014: First Marahon (fingers crossed)
               Oct 2015: Ironman

I know I'm getting waaaay ahead of myself. But it will definitely keep me focused and motivated.

The only problem I'm having is over doing it. I was EXHAUSTED this morning. Like my alarm went off and I was like my kids when they stay up too late. I was walking into everything. Too exhausted to keep my eyes open but I grabbed my running clothes and headed to the bathroom to start my routine. I could barely stand up straight on the scale. I headed back into bed and fell back asleep. I must have been tired because that NEVER happens. Once I'm up I'm up and nothing can get me back down. This is the first morning that I haven't been out the door to start my morning with a workout since the 13th. I know that it's ok to take a day off, but I'm having incredible self-loathing and guilt about not doing anything this morning. I passed three runners on my commute in and all it did was make things worse. I don't know how to not be a head case. Any pointers would be welcomed!!

In non-headcase news I made my first weight goal this week. I am officially 230 pounds! I've lost 40 since January. My next weight goal is to lose 15 more. Then I will be the weight that I was when I walked across stage to receive my high school graduation. What a thought!! I would love to make this goal by the time the half rolls around. I do think that this is entirely doable as it's just about 1 pound per week. After that I only have one more weight goal in mind. I'd like to end at 195. This takes me out of the obese bmi category (into overweight, but I don't want to be in normal range, I'd like to have more muscle mass than that). Greg and I both think that I ought to have the skin removal surgery when the time comes. I'm already nutty about how I look now. I was never self-concious before. My body (while large) was round and smooth. I didn't mind that. I do mind this droopy, wrinkled, old lady skin. I don't feel young looking at myself. I think planning wise, I'd be looking to do it after the Disney race in 2014. Then I'd get a few months of recovery and have about a year to train back up for the Ironman.

Sorry for the novel, but this is bound to happen when I don't get on enough for shorter more frequent updates!

Found a Race!

So I finally found a good 5k to make my first race. It's a charitable run for a nearby elementary school. Since it's at a school it's geared towards families and kids. My kids won't need to be bored waiting for mommy to run the race. They'll have the school playground to keep them occupied. Afterwards there's a free buffet, dj, face painting, auction, and other activities for the kids. I'm super excited!

I did notice a downfall though. I was totally negative in my thinking this morning while running. That I am too slow, that I'm too accustomed to the treadmill and there's no way I'll make it outdoors. I started out stronger than usual this morning, which means I needed an extra walk break during the last mile. This was failure in my head. However, I'm pleased to say that it was my fastest run (that was longer than a mile) to date. Overall I had a 12:05 pace. So, I don't know if this negative mind monster is a good thing or bad thing. It challenges me, but I hope it doesn't get destructive.

I actually started getting comments about my weight loss. It only took 23 pounds to get there. I received nice words from my old boss yesterday (a feat in itself), and a super nice girl at the gym I've been chatty with was exclaiming how well I've been doing. It feels good to hear. I also think my husband is appreciating it, which is a big motivator, though I don't expect him to come out and actually say it.

I think the next time I go clothes shopping I may be trying on a size 16. That will be a nice feeling. Hopefully then I will only have about 20 or so more pounds before I hit the 12 I want. It will be nice to not have to shop at over-priced plus-size stores!